Anxiously Engaged

My heart has been so full lately. I am so blessed by everything in my life. I am so grateful for this beautiful world and for the happiness that it holds. I have never felt this way before. I feel like a part of me that was empty is full and I want more. I don't ever want to stop progressing, loving, and helping. I want to be better. I want to be the best that I possibly can. I am grateful for the lessons I was taught growing up and I am thankful that I (for the most part) did what I was supposed to. I definitely have made my share (and much more) of mistakes. I might not have understood why I was or wasn't supposed to do something but I am learning now how everything fits together. When I was 14, I didn't think I could wait to date until I was 16. When I was 16, I didn't understand why we couldn't date one person steadily (I did anyway. And a lot of heartache and heartbreak resulted from it). When I was 18, I didn't understand how I could possibly fit in school, sports, friends, sleep AND my church callings/activities, but I found a way anyway. I did the things I had been taught my whole life.

I know now that dating at 14 has no purpose. That dating is for marriage and 14 year olds aren't looking to get married, so then what?

I know now that dating one person steadily almost always leads to mistakes and hurting. Sometimes it takes a really long time for that hurting to go away. 

I know now that if I put Heavenly Father first, above all else, things fall into place. I know that because I tested it and I KNOW its true. When I put His will above mine, my needs are always, always taken care of. 

This is all on my mind because I am thinking of how much sadness and hard times we can avoid if we listen to the counsel others give. It is hard when someone is about to go through something that you already have been through and they don't listen to guidance you are trying to give. I haven't always listened to the advice that other people have given me, but I am so incredibly grateful that, for the most part, if I am counseled to do something I do it. I know that this blog probably doesn't make sense, but I just want whoever reading this to know that its worth it. Helping people is worth it, loving is worth it, going to church is worth it, praying is worth it, going to the temple is worth it, spending time with your family is worth it, reading your scriptures is worth it, its all worth it. Just do what you're supposed to. If it doesn't make sense now, I promise it will in the future. Fake it til you make it. Heavenly Father will bless you for all you do, and then some. 

It is all worth it.