I'm feeling normal!

Today I felt something great. I felt normal! Sometimes we take it for granted. We take for granted that we can get out of bed without help, that we can go anywhere whenever we want, and that we can shower without having to sit down because you feel like passing out. These are things I am especially grateful for. For the last 10 months I longed for some sort of normalcy and I feel like today I got it! It felt so good. Leila slept in til about 11 this morning so while she was asleep I got up and made banana bread, assembled some jalepeno poppers (next time wear gloves!! :|) and tidied up some around the house. I have slowly been getting back to working out and have been wanting to start running, but I couldn't figure out a good way to go about it with nursing. I could pump right before to be empty but then I am worried about producing more and getting mastitis again. I will experiment with it when I get back from CO and MN. Anyways because Leila slept in so long I was full on both sides so she ate on one and I pumped the other and we went to the indoor track so I could run!
I wanted to run a mile but I don't think I did, I ran for 10 minutes and every muscle in my leg was on fire. I lost all my muscle on bedrest, this should be fun getting it all back. I never realized how much I run on my toes until my calves were screaming at me. And let me tell you, I LOVED IT. I love being able to workout and shower normal and swim and sleep comfortably (although I still miss laying on my belly :(, I thought I'd get to do that again after she came out but nursing..)

Sometimes in life you get dealt really tough, scary cards, but everything always works out. With the support and prayers from family and friends I really have felt lifted. I feel so so blessed. Love my baby. Love my husband. Love my body. Love my life.

Today was a lovely day

Reasons why today was a lovely day:

1. I worked hard cleaning our kitchen and bathroom. Pinesol got a new smell? When did that happen? :( or did I just grab the wrong container?

2. Shannae and I sorted Leilas newborn clothes, most of which she has grown out of.

3. (This part of the day was not lovely) I went to the dentist to get three fillings (thank you pregnancy hormones for making me throw up everyday and make my teeth start to decay). It was absolutely awful. I don't know if my dentist just wasn't nice and gentle, but it was an awful experience. I don't remember it being that bad. I had been thinking of how to make my kids not afraid of going to the dentist and ways I could make it an enjoyable/memorable experience but after today I decided it is probably just going to be one of those lessons I have to teach them about doing things that are no fun because you have to for whatever reason. In this case, teeth are important and its better in the long run to take care of your teeth now. Yes, it might be awful but you just suck it up and think of yourself as a better person because of it. The lovely part of this is that my mouth is no longer numb.

4. Took a shower and shaved! 

5. Parted my bangs the other way and they looked nice. 

6. I got a little workout in.

7. Leila and I went on a walk. I wore my running shoes for the first time in who knows how long. I think I am ready to start running again! 

8. I started writing thank you cards. 

9. Tyler bought me mint chocolate chip ice cream.

10. I listened to Relient K's new CD.

11. Got the most adorable picture of my niece, Annie.

12. And last but not least, it was Camilles birthday. My other half :) love her so much! 

Love, 

Kelli

Oh sorry there are more!

13. Leila looked so cute in her outfit today and took two real naps in the room, in her bassinet!

14. Leila and I hung out in the grass as the summer sun went down.

I have a good life.

Leila's Birth Story

I went in for my weekly appt on Friday May, 27th. When the doctor measured my belly it was about 2cm smaller than the week before. Baby's heartbeat was great but he was concerned that I wasn't growing anymore. He sent me to get an ultrasound to check on babygirl. If she had dropped to the 10th percentile, we would be doing an emergency induction that night. Leila was in the 50th percentile the week before. The ultrasound was good, we saw her heartbeat, the fluid levels were great, and then the ultrasound tech stopped at an area where there was a lot of blood. I asked if that was the umbilical cord and she said yep! Leila's head was measuring around 35 weeks (I was 39 weeks) and all her other body parts were a little behind that.She had dropped to the 20th percentile. My doctor explained the reasons we should probably induce this weekend, including that the ultrasound tech was pretty sure her umbilical cord was wrapped twice around her neck. Its not super uncommon for this to happen but since it was wrapped twice and she wasn't growing, he was concerned she wasn't getting the nourishment she needed. Also, I was on blood thinners still and it would be a good opportunity for me to stop them before labor if it was planned. So I didn't take anymore blood thinners and we were scheduled to be induced Saturday night!

Saturday was weird. Trying to have a normal day when you know you are going to have a baby that night is really strange. Tyler's sister, Jessie, was there and we all went to eat lunch at Firehouse subs. I knew I needed to eat a good meal because my body would need the energy. I could not think about the induction while eating or I would lose my appetite. We went to the outlets by thanksgiving point and walked around a bit. I looked around at all the people and thought how weird it was that they were all just living their lives and had no idea that tonight my whole world would change. How could life being going on so normal when I was going to have a baby?!? lol We went The Children's Place and got a few things because we were having a baby SOON! We went to the airport and picked up my mom, I'm so happy she was able to come!

The rest of the day we waited to go to the hospital, at some point they called and said to come at 630 instead of 6. I really couldn't eat dinner. I was so nervous and nauseous. I was able to eat a piece of toast with chocolate milk and then it was pretty much time to go! We got there and they took us back. One of the nurses behind the counter said are you ready to have a baby?! I guess so! haha They took me to my room, gave me a gown, and said to call them when I was done. I did that in like 2 min. Lets get this party started people! Sooner we start the sooner its done. They put in the IV and capped it. About an hour later she came and checked how dilated I was and gave me my first does of Cytotec. I was dilated about 1cm. I would get a dose of cytotec every 4 hours, my dr assumed I would get 3-4 doses. My mom said something about when the baby would be born and the nurse said the baby would probably be born Sunday evening, since this was my first pregnancy I would probably progress slow. The evening was pretty uneventful from there. Tyler and I watched TV (I think there was a NBA finals game on?) and my mom took walks, discovering Winco and TacoTime. She went at least twice during the first 24-48 hours we were at the hospital. At midnight it was time for another cytotec dose and I asked the nurse for something to help me sleep because I knew I wouldn't be able to on my own. I slept for about an hour and then started getting contractions. They weren't painful, just uncomfortable, especially since I wasn't allowed to get off the bed. I couldn't even sit up because they didn't want me to move the cytotec off my cervix. So I just laid down. Tyler was asleep and I watched Ninja Warrior. At around 4 o'clock it was time for my next dose. The nurse came in and checked me, I was dilated to a 3 and almost fully effaced! So no more cytotec (Cytotec was used to soften my cervix, I had been taking evening primrose oil daily for at least a month and I really think it helped get me effaced so quickly!). My contractions werent awful but they were getting consistent, I asked for something to take the edge off and she gave me fentanyl (I think...) through my IV. I don't exactly know what happened but I felt WEIRD. Tyler said the first thing that I did when I got it was slap myself in the face. I did not like how it made me feel. I told the nurse that and she said it would only last for about an hour so it wouldn't be much longer. I don't understand why they give that to people especially if it only works for an hour??? The nurse said my doctor would be in soon to break my water to get things going. I don't remember what time he came but it was a while, maybe 7 or 8? He came and broke my water which was a really weird feeling. It felt like I got buckets of warm water thrown on me! They surrounded me with towels and soaked it all up. They hooked my IV up to some fluids since I lost all that water and because I was probably dehydrated anyway. My dr was impressed at how I was progressing. He then went to church and I went into labor. haha (Utah :)) Contractions really started up now, I wish I didn't have to stay in the bed because I would have been able to manage them more. All I could do was hug the side of the bed tight when I would get a contraction.  I asked when a good time to get the epidural would be. My dr thought this would be a good time because even if I was in labor for another 18-24 hours it would still be effective because of my size. The anesthesiologist came in to give me my epidural. The nurse told him about my medical history (blood clot, blood thinners) and what my blood level was at (they wont give you an epidural if your blood is too thin, there is a risk of being paralyzed if something went wrong) but my blood levels were fine so he felt comfortable giving me it. I got in position and he said to make sure not to move. I really hoped I didn't get a contraction while he was giving me it because I don't think I could have stayed still. He told me that I had an arch in my back, or it was curved or something like that, and I said oh is that good? Does it make it easier? And he said no lol I was like why did you tell me that lol. I got the epidural and my left leg got tingley really quickly and soon I could not move my legs at all. My lower back was hurting from laying down all night in the same position (and probably a little because I was in labor lol) so I would slowly and carefully rotate from my left side to my right side. It was great to not feel contractions anymore! This was at about 9 o'clock Sunday morning. I started to feel nauseous and sure enough I threw up. and again. and again. and probably every 10 minutes for the next 3 hours. I couldnt stop throwing up and Tyler and my mom took turns holding the throw up tube and rinsing it out. My mom kept wetting the washcloth for my forehead and Tyler kept getting paper towels to wipe me up with after I threw up. They are so nice.  At about 1030/11 my nurse came in and checked me, I was at a 6! She said baby will be here in the next couple hours so she went to call my dr. I think it was around 12 or 1230 when she came back and I was at a 9. I asked her for something to help me stop throwing up, I was still throwing up, it felt like non stop since I had the epidural. She gave me some zofran, why didn't I think of that earlier?? Im glad I didn't, you'll read why in a min. Other nurses started to come in and get everything ready, they brought a table in and started warming up the baby machine. My dr came in and said again how he was impressed with how I was progressing (me too! Good job, body!) I asked if it had been a busy morning and he said oh no not really, just went to church. I thought that was so funny that this was a normal Sunday for him. Break someones water, church, deliver a baby.... Dr's are awesome.  I told him how much I'd been throwing up and he said that's probably why I progressed so quickly! At around 1'clock I started pushing, which was by far the most motivating part. Everyone was cheering for me! My delivery nurse was on my left counting through contractions and Tyler was on my right, I think his hand was on my head and he kept saying things like "Come on, Kel! You're almost there!" and my dr was really motivating, too, telling me how effective my pushes were and that I was doing a great job! I felt her coming down and after every contraction the nurse would move the monitor around to make sure baby's heart was still going strong. At one point, I heard my dr say something like she is far enough now that if they had to use something to get her out, he could. I don't remember who it was but someone told me to look down and see her head. That was amazing! Leila was so beautiful. I saw the dr carefully unwrapping the cord from around her neck. Then they put a warm towel on my belly/chest and put her in it!She was so sweet and screaming her head off. I kept saying shh shh and my mom kept saying its good for her to cry! But I didn't want her to. I knew she was cold and scared and she didn't know why she wasn't so close to me anymore so I held her close! I watched Tyler cut her cord after it had stopped pulsing and then I just held her close as the dr stitched me up. She was 6lbs and 15 oz, 19.5" long, born at 1:24pm May 29th. At one point, I think it was when they took Leila to get measured I asked to see the placenta and the dr showed me the different parts of it. I touched it, it was strange and not what I expected. It was not smooth. Then soon after I got to hold my precious baby again, in her little hospital beanie. My little cutie. I love you, Leila Anne!